I think I've discovered a state between earth and heaven. Early pregnancy. I'm still having zero symptoms of any kind. An inflated sense of enhanced well-being prevails. I wish there was a way I could verify daily that I actually am pregnant. An at-home ultrasound machine, maybe?
My eyes are wide open about what is coming at me. I know there will come a time when challenges prevail.
I just read an article today that said that overweight women have much greater risk of gestational diabetes, preclamsia as well as "miscarriage, preterm labor, high blood pressure, certain birth defects, postpartum hemorrhage, postpartum blood clots, postpartum pneumonia, postpartum depression, c-section wound infection, having a large baby, having a baby that gets stuck on the way out, and having a c-section." Stuck on the way out??? Yikes!
I've read some of the beautifully and brutally honest blogs of new mothers. I'm aware that mothering a newborn on my own will be the toughest thing I've ever done. I know there will be fatigue, screaming, poop, no sleep, lots of worry, barf, mountains of laundry and so much more I'm not aware of. C said it best. It won't be like whatever you think it will be like.
Not to mention, mothering a teen. Ugh. And sending a child off to college? When I'm close to 60? Ummm, paying for college when I'm supposed to be thinking about retirement?
But for now that all seems so very far away and I'm cherishing every moment of this pregnancy nirvana. Banking these precious moments for when times get tough. That old Frank Sinatra song runs through my head everyday:
"Fairy tales do come true. It could happen to you...."