Conference Quandary

I've been proctoring the ISAT test for our third graders all week. My heart goes out to our kids who have been working so hard and are so very serious while taking the test. They know it's a big deal and that they are being asked to prove themselves as representatives of our school. One little boy was so engrossed that when the teacher was walking around monitoring, he didn't notice her until she got very close and then she startled him and he fell out of his chair. However, for me it has been more boring than watching grass grow. Within about 20 minutes of starting the test, I feel the urge to start pacing like a caged animal. By the end of testing the second group of kids, I could scream. It is my sincere hope that our test scores show the hard work and true growth of our students and teachers.

Thank God I got my car back today and turned in the gas-smelling, motor-smoking Mazda van rental. I'm so happy to have that ordeal over with. Her insurance paid for everything but it was a pain in the arse with a lot of phone calls and running around.

I usually don't get opportunities like this but my principal has asked me to go to three different reading conferences. In March, at the end of April and mid July. The mid-March one is about an hour away, no big deal. The other two will require travel by plane and hotel stays and I won't really know where I'll be as far as becoming/being pregnant. I don't want to plan my life assuming I'll become pregnant but I don't want to have to back out at the last minute because of the treatment schedule or a high-risk pregnancy. At the end of April, I'll just be finishing up the cycle before THE cycle. But my period did show up 5 days early this month and until I have an IVF calendar in my hot, little hands I will feel like anything could happen. Heck, anything could happen after I get the calendar, it all seems so uncertain.

Mid-July I'll either be at the beginning of a high risk pregnancy or nursing a disappointed broken heart or trying again. Please, please, please, let me be experiencing pregnancy with all it's joys and trials.